Change means releasing the old and embracing the new. Crazy thing is, we don’t always know what to embrace.
For a few years I’ve felt change bubbling inside. The last decade I’ve helped over 1,500 mostly home-based business owners enjoy greater success. I’m a marketing mentor – and I’m good at what I do. When clients act on what I teach – and most do – I’m thrilled for them.
When “Testosterone-Free Marketing” was released I left the Robert Allen organization. Yep, author of mega-bestsellers like “Nothing Down,” “Multiple Streams of Income,” and “The Enlightened Millionaire.” I was his Executive Assistant for 18 months. Then I became the top Marketing Trainer and mentor for his Enlightened Millionaire program for six years.
By Denise Michaels
Years ago I worked for a millionaire who said, “Common sense is uncommon, Denise.”
I watch with amazement new women business owners and I see what they become. Sometimes the results are spectacular. Other times they’re not. I meet people in networking meetings, on my teleclasses, at workshops or through emails that lack so much basic common sense I wonder how successful they could ever possibly become.
Daily I get emails and phone messages with no name. How can you form a relationship with people you want to help you if you don’t tell them your name? Doesn’t it make sense a mentor would be more inclined to help people they know, like and appreciate – starting with their name? How will this person ever complete a business transaction?
When making calls to people a couple weeks ago regarding my workshop – even though I just left my name, number and where I met the person – fully two-thirds never called back. All of them say they want more business – so why wouldn’t they return a phone call?
People miss phone meetings because they get confused about which time zone they live in. How will these people ever complete business deals if they can’t keep their own time zone straight?
Make it easy for people to say “yes.” Keep your word and be a person people can count on. Learn how to count time zones. If you do business with people outside the USA, as I occasionally do, learn how to use one of the easy currency converter sites. If you have to miss an appointment, be gracious enough to let the person know. The more you make your request easy and idiot-proof, the more likely you are to get a “yes”. The more difficult you make it, the more likely you are to get a “no.”
A great example was a man who sent me a lengthy email stating he wanted my help with marketing but he was afraid to share his idea because he was ripped off by someone else. I replied, “If you want me to sign a Confidentiality Agreement or anything so you feel comfortable speaking with me, I’m happy to do so.”
His reply said, “Okay, write up a legal agreement, print it, sign it and mail it back to me.” He made it overly difficult to help him so I didn’t.
The piece de resistance was last week. A woman wrote asking if I knew anyone who could help her with her website issues. I contacted a web expert who’s a woman. I gave the web expert the name and contact info of the woman who needed help creating a website. She replied, “Tell her she can call me if she wants to.”
I told her Lesson Numero Uno when someone gives you a referral is to be pro-active and follow up yourself. If you don’t, your referrals will dry up.
Lesson Number Two: go back to the person who referred you, thank them again and share with them what transpired. People who refer you want to see you succeed. They want to know what happened. If anyone helps you, go back and tell them how things turned out when you used their suggestions.
If you want to be successful you must take on success habits. That means not only visionary thinking and the right attitude, but also doing the little things right like returning phone calles. Make it easy for people to say “yes” to doing business with you.
Think about “cause” and “effect”. Think about what you want the experience of doing business with you to be like. What steps can you take to make it easier for prospective customeers to say “yes”? How can you think from their point of view and make it a slam dunk?
When people help you out, do you get back to them, thank them and let them know how their advice turned out? Or, do you act as if you’re somehow entitled and never say a word? Life is easier when you treat others as you want to be treated. It boils down to The Golden Rule.
Do you have a story from your business of someone who didn’t mean to do the wrong thing – but just plain didn’t have any common sense at all?
Take an extra moment to think things through in a way that makes people want to say “yes”. Use that uncommon common sense that’s so rare. Just by doing the right thing – you’ll have a huge advantage over others in your industry.
Denise Michaels is author of the business bestseller, “Testosterone-Free Marketing.” Get your copy by clicking here. And, get Denise’s weekly empowerment and marketing tips by clicking here. Come join Denise Michaels in a movement to empower women business owners like you to be all you can be and to have more joy, more fun and more success in your life.
By Denise Michaels
On Monday, I got a wonderful email from a client. He was so excited because after putting it off, after going through a lot of financial hardship this last year with real estate and stocks, etc. After losing a beloved brother who always encouraged him and made him believe he could do anything. After going through a serious car accident with broken ribs and more – he finally took a massive step toward starting a new life for himself.
My client, I’ll call him Ned, mentored with me on a regular basis last year and was making great progress. He is sort of a massage therapist to the stars. People like actors Ted Danson and Ben Affleck are his clients. He wanted to take his secrets of how to have a very successful, profitable massage therapy practise out to other massage therapists. He wants to eventually stop doing massage and focus much more attention on workshops, trainings and other info-products. He’s already taught at a massage school.
His vision is all about finding a way to take his expertise to others and make that a business model. So we worked with that. I sensed he had a lot of fear around doing this without his brother there for him. His parents are deceased as well. There were even moments when he felt a little hopeless – I’d encourage him and he’d pull himself back up and get going again.
We put a lot of time into figuring out the agenda for his workshop. Years ago a woman with a Ph.D. in Instructional Design helped me put together my first workshop – so I shared that knowledge with him and together we came up with a wonderful program for him. It felt true and authentic to who he is and his experience and he knew it would help other massage therapists while also being fresh and new. We also talked about getting the word out and how to fill the room with the right people. People who were willing to learn AND willing to pay.
Then September 15, 2008 happened. The stock market was in an upheaval and he lost money. You remember. He owned two rental homes and both his tenants lost their jobs and couldn’t pay rent. So he was struggling to keep up the mortgages. The number of people booking massages with him dropped – so his income from that source dropped, too. Consequently, he wasn’t able to keep up marketing mentoring with me. But once in awhile he’d pay me for one session at a time. And he’d keep me posted by email.
I’m not 100 percent sure when my last mentoring session was with him. I’d have to look through my calendar. I think it was August. In between – except for connecting with me on Facebook – I didn’t really know if he was still working at it or not.
Monday when I got his email telling me what a triumph his workshop was the weekend before, I was jumping up and down excited for him. It’s just a start but his information was very well received and he also made a profit. Whoooo-hooo! He did it with a healing rib from his car accident – but he kept breathing through it (I’ve heard healing ribs are painful) and he was successful. In the last paragraph he said, “Denise, I put payment for another mentoring session with you in your paypal account – just let me know when you can meet.”
You might already know I have a workshop coming up this Monday November 2nd here in Las Vegas. I have three seats remaining so if you’d like to find out more and attend click on the link at the top of this page that says “Denise’s Events.” But the reason I’m digressing like this is because I’m very recently aware of all the work it takes to put together a successful event even if your health is just fine.
Ned is turning his life around in the direction he’s wanted to go for years now. He’s inching closer and closer to living his dream. And I couldn’t be more happy for him – and thrilled to know that I had a little something to do with his new success. What’s you’re dream and are you getting help and guidance in making those positive changes to your business income and your life.
By Denise Michaels, Author, “Testosterone Free Marketing”
People who are passionate about living an independent, financially free life often decide they want a mentor to provide insight and ideas to help them on their path. Maybe there’s someone in your industry you know, or, you just know of who could help you take your business to the next level. How can you get that person to share their wisdom and help you get on the right path? How can you rise above so they want to share and give you a little extra help?
I’ve been a mentor to people for years, but never more intensively than since I became an author, trainer, speaker and marketing mentor as my business. This article will help you know how women in business can approach a prospective mentor in a way that will make that person more positively pre-disposed to helping you succeed.
Read these ten tips and go find your mentor.
• Take an interest in the person as a human being. I have an Internet mentor whose wildly successful. After I ask him a question I always ask him about what’s going on in his life, share a joke or tell him something funny that’s happened. For example recently I wrote him and after asking I question I typed, “Tomorrow I’m speaking at a workshop, so right now I’m sitting in my desk at the hotel catching up on emails with hair dye on top of my head.” He wrote back that he laughed so hard he almost fell off his chair. You don’t have to tell your whole life story, but make yourself real. Make it light and fun.
• Don’t say, “I’d like to pick your brain.” My brain “done been picked dry” and I start feeling bored when I hear those words. I know the time I spend with that person will be nothing but an interrogation. Instead say, “I’d really value your opinion.” It’s gentler and I get the sense it’ll be a more pleasant conversation rather than an interrogation with harsh lights shining down. Besides mentors are like every other human being – they’re looking for win-win relationships, too.
• Don’t try to monopolize a lot of your mentor’s time. Especially at first. Connect in a way that’s quick and easy. Don’t invite them to dinner. That’s a two hour time commitment. If you’re at a seminar they probably already have meetings scheduled. If it’s at home, they probably want some “down-time” Offer to drive them to the airport or share a cab. Ask what they like in their coffee or tea. Bring it to ‘em and get 15 quality minutes.
• Be clear about what you’re doing and what you need. There is so much “murky thinking” in the world. I’m amazed at people who feel they must write five pages to express one idea. That means you don’t know what you’re talking about. Develop a clear elevator speech and mission statement. Think about one or two specific questions you need answered and think about your words and how to ask those questions clearly.
• Listen, listen, listen to what they say. Don’t think about all the reasons why you can’t. That’s part of the reason why you’re not where you want to be yet. Say something like, “I’m dealing with yada, yada, yada – how would you suggest I overcome those obstacles?”
• Don’t say, “I’m looking for a mentor.” It’s easy to deflect a statement like this with a smile and not make a commitment. Instead say, “Would it be okay with you if we connected by email or on the phone once in awhile to get your opinion? I’d really value that.” It would be hard to say “no” to a simple, clear request like that.
• Thank the person for their time. Don’t take well intentioned advice – especially when it’s offered free – without saying “thank you.” Tell them what you’re plan to do. When you take action, be sure to let them know. Always, always, always tell them when you take an action step. It’s so easy to follow-up with email and so gratifying for the person who’s mentoring with you.
• Many experienced people who avoid mentoring others do so because someone more novice will take their time and advice and never follow up. It feels like a one-way street. Over the years I’ve had people beg me for my time and experience and yet offer nothing in return. I’ve met a number of women over the years who’ve said, “Denise, but what do I possibly have to offer? This person is so much more successful than me.” I once had a business mentor, a highly successful millionaire, who met with me every 2-3 weeks to discuss my goals and I got his input and ideas on business strategy.
What did he get in return? He saw me as being successful in personal relationships, so he wanted my opinions, thoughts and insights on how he could be more successful in that aspect of his life. You never know what’s important to others. Never assume you have nothing of value to offer – you don’t know until you get to know someone.
• Reciprocate once in awhile. If you see an article you think they would enjoy – send it to them with a quick note. If you have a trade or a skill and can offer to help them out in some way – offer it. Don’t say, “How can I help you?” Then they have to figure it out. That’s effort. Say, “I’m really very good at _____. If you ever need _____ give me a call, I’ll be more than happy to help out any way I can.” Even if they never take you up on it, they will appreciate that you offered. Then, your relationship is one of equals.
• Make the link between cause and effect. Don’t put your mentor in a position where he/she has to figure it all out for you. You’re not a baby. The job of a mentor is not to take you by the hand every step of the way. Look in the dictionary under “mentor.” It’s to give you some guidance as you’re on your way. Your job is to make the link between what you’re told and how you’ll apply it to your life.
And one more tip as a bonus:
• Thank the person for their time. Don’t take well intentioned advice – especially when it’s offered free – without saying “thank you.” Tell them what you’re going to do and when you take action, be sure to let them know. Always, always, always tell them when you take an action step. It’s so easy to follow-up with email and so gratifying for the person who’s mentoring with you.
Get Denise Michaels empowering FREE tips – that will help you be marketing savvy and feel more confident on the inside and appear confident outside. Click here to get yours in your Inbox.
By Denise Michaels, Author, “Testosterone-Free Marketing”
I’m leaving for the gym in a few minutes. It’s out of my comfort zone and not where I feel confident by any stretch of the imagination. As a woman business owner I have so much more to do that’s the highest and best use of my time. If I’m not marketing or selling, I’m talking with a mentoring client, creating alliances, planning for my next workshop or maybe throwing a load of clothes into the washer. But I’m going to the gym in a few minutes anyway. My husband Ernie’s bugging me to get moving.
When I get there I’ll probably groan through the first few laps around the track before picking up steam. I’ll probably do some upper body exercises with weights. Some of those machines I actually get a weird pleasure from Then I’ll walk and it’ll feel effortless to total three miles. I’d still rather be working on my business.
I feel like a fish out of water at the gym. I don’t look like the impossibly fit bodies there. I go with the eternal hope someday this 50-plus body will be whipped into shape.
I’m thinking about two marketing mentoring clients I talked with yesterday. During our session they exclaimed, “But Denise, I don’t do THAT! I’ve NEVER done that before.” They were arguing for their limitations. These were tasks that were new but not necessarily difficult or requiring a high degree of skill.
Isn’t that the point? Your business growth cannot happen any faster than your personal growth.
Before agreeing to work with a new client I ask a few questions. One of them is, How many hours a week do you put into your business?” Some clients still have full time jobs – however I’m not the right person to work with anyone putting in less than 15 hours a week. I also ask, “Are you willing to get out of your comfort zone?” Because the things you’ll need to do to reach your goals will naturally be different than the things you’ve already done. This takes many people out of their comfort zone.
We all have the tasks and activities we feel confident about. They come so naturally to us its like falling off a log. Everything else tends to make us a little uncomfortable. If you don’t take a chance and try something new you’ll never know exactly what your business and your life could’ve been otherwise.
Get my marketing and empowerment tips in your Inbox at http://www.EmpowerUAcademy.com
Discover more about how marketing mentoring with Denise can help you reach the levels of success you’re striving for at http://www.MentoringwithDenise.com
By Denise Michaels, Author, “Testosterone-Free Marketing”
I’m always bouncing back and forth between working online and offline to bring attention to my message and gain more people interested in my message and what I do.
Today is an offline day – It’s 6:53 am and in five minutes I need to jump in the shower and get ready to drive across town for a networking breakfast. It’s a long way to go -but it’s a really great meeting and a lot of people have purchased my book and taken an interest in my Testosterone-Free Marketing message. It’s with a group I joined a few months ago called Defining Women Network*. Empowering, fun and they really do business with each other.
Then, I have two meetings at the brand new “M” resort – a gorgeous place. They have a huge lobby area that overlooks the pool and a few miles away you can see the legendary Las Vegas strip. It’s far enough away from the ubiquitious casinos we have out here that you don’t hear the clanging bells that are part of the casino scene.
It’s elegant and lovely in a clean, modern, zen kind of way – I’m going to wrap up my laptop and take it with me and work there for awhile. My guess is they won’t have wifi access – but I have a writing project I need to complete for a client – so I can do that offline. I crave opportunities to work in lovely, elegant settings. I like my office at home – just painted it and redecorated a few weeks ago. But in comparison this space is opulent. It inspires me and encourages me to think abundant thoughts and ideas. I encourage you to find ways to work in lovely settings outside of your office to inspire you. Then, I’ll bounce back home before the rush hour starts.
The meetings are sort of “getting to know you” kind of meetings – but I’m hoping one of the two will become a marketing mentoring client.
Have a great day yourself – whatever you’re doing. Holy cow – I’ve got 15 minutes to shower, get dressed, put on makeup and get out the door. Gotta fly!
PS: Defining Women has seven groups in the Las Vegas area and one in Salem OR – if you’d like more info go to http://www.DefiningWomenNetwork.com