Posts Tagged ‘money’

Let’s be honest.

Many women who own businesses say they’re dedicated to  creating success but they really have an expensive hobby.  They take mincing steps questioning spending ten bucks on flyers or twenty bucks for a new book. But they effort spend hundreds on a new outfit or purse. Will this help you get closer to living an excellent adventure?

I call it Cupcake Marketing.

Back in the day women were always asked to bake cupcakes for bake sales. So they did. Some women still do. Many women always comply – and never ask for anything in return. They give it all away. Their hard work and ingredients are sold.

Eventually, many get peeved they’re always asked to bake cupcakes. But they wouldn’t dare say “no.” After all, they want to “be nice.”  Nice is more important than time or money.

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Friends are fascinating.  We see in them who we are – and sometimes we see who we don’t want to be. It’s natural to want to help people who are struggling but very often what’s most screwed up is their mindset.  For whatever reason each person must experience their own journey just like a butterfly must release itself from it’s cocoon or a baby chick must break free of the egg on it’s own.

This post is about three people I know and care about.  All have fallen on tough times economically.  All have been pushed into massive mid-life change and are doing their best to deal with the adjustments.  Each has handled it differently.

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It takes money to go on an Excellent Adventure. Even if you’re budgeting by couch-surfing, you’ll need money for planes, trains, meals and other things so you’re never caught short of cash. If you’re going to make money online as you travel it’s still a good idea to have a reserve to fall back on as you travel.

For decades Americans have been awful when it comes to saving. We were the largest debtor nation ever and our savings rate was in the negative numbers. Most Americans had an average of six credit cards with $10,000 to $20,000 in debt.

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Enjoying an excellent adventure that involves extended travel will probably include finding ways to create cash flow on the road. Since you don’t want to work 40+ hours a week as you travel, it’s crucial to find ways to create more income in less hours.

One great thing about my life is for 18 years I’ve found ways to make money doing what I’m passionate about. Y’know, the “Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow” idea from Marsha Sinetar’s book.

Fine, but at age 52 I’m aware I never stop DOing. I’m ready to be a human BEing rather than a human DOing. Ready to DO different things.

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A few weeks ago on “Housewives of New York” on the Bravo TV network, one of the “housewives” held up a purse her husband apparently bought her as a birthday gift. It still had the price tag on it. $14,000.!!

$14,000 for a purse?!? As if we’re supposed to aspire to that. As if we’re supposed to feel “not good enough” if we can’t afford that extravagance.

Geez, for $14,000 a lot of people could have an amazing excellent adventure and tramp halfway around the world. Or, pay to go back to school. Or, a lot of things.

I was reading the New York Times and discovered an article with the headline, “But Will it Make You Happy?”

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By Denise Michaels

I used to attend a women’s business networking group where the social aspect was the most important thing and doing business was way down on the list. Even though their mission statement said they were committed to business. It wasn’t a group getting together for martini’s or margueritas at the end of the day. This group of 25-30 women business owners arrived once a week at 7:00 am for breakfast and they all acted like business didn’t matter much.

Doesn’t that seem a little weird?

Coming across as if you care about business and making a fair and abundant income for what you do is considered crass and icky by many women in what seems like all age groups. It’s as if it’s just supposed to happen – without asking or saying anything. These are the same women who privately fret over their bills because they don’t have enough money to cover everything. It’s almost as if somewhere in their subconscious they want someone to step in and handle it all. Write them a check to cover the shortage every month and just say, “It’s okay, honey. I know it’s tough out there. I’ll take care of you so you can go play and not worry about those nasty ol’ bills.”

A sugar Daddy – but no one calls it that because that would mean we’re golddiggers. None of us wants to be perceived as caring much about money, or, having a relationship about money. We just want it all to magically be taken care of without having to ask. That’s what husbands used to do.

Remember when Princess Diana died? It was August of 1997. There was a massive outpouring of grief and tears worldwide by women that totally eclipsed the death of any other celebrity. The funeral was watched by over a billion people around the globe. What was that about?

Many women saw in Diana a beautiful, caring woman who represented our desires for Camelot and Prince Charming. Someone to take care of everything and make it all better. Even after she and the Prince divorced, she didn’t have him but she still had money, the elegant estate, the gorgeous gowns and the worldwide stature as a Princess and everything that implies. When she died the hope for a handsome man swooping in on a white horse and saving us from all the headaches of “the real world” died, too. That’s where I believe a lot of the tears came from.

We really gotta get over our immaturity over money and making money.

I’m not suggesting we become money-grubbing and take advantage of customers. That’s a sure way to be unhappy and go out of business. I’m suggesting women charge what they’re worth instead of under-cutting themselves because they don’t feel “worthy” of as much money as others, or, because they want to “be nice.” Which usually translates into, “I don’t want to market myself and I hope by seriously undercutting my prices I won’t have to.”

Except this “strategy” boomerangs. People don’t think people cut prices to be nice. They figure, “Gee, she’s probably not as good.”

Same thing when it comes to asking for the sale. Many women won’t ask. They keep hoping customers will say, “Okay, I’ll take two.” Or, they ask in such a hesistant way customers sense their hesitation and back off.

We really gotta get over it.

A lot of other women say they do their business for fun. If a person doesn’t need money there are so many amazing things you can do for fun: travel, write a book, volunteer, go to the gym and work out, get involved in your community politically, enjoy hobbies, crafts, learn to be a gourmet cook, play tennis or golf, play with children and grandchildren. When did business become an outlet for “fun” for women and not about making money? A lot of women aren’t being honest or fair with themselves and others.

Yes, there can be many satisfying aspects to owning a business for women. And there should be. But not caring about making money? The purpose of a business is to make money. That’s the primary purpose. If you’re not making money you don’t have a business – you have an expensive hobby.

Isn’t it time we grow up and get over it? Isn’t it time we stop kidding ourselves, hoping some mythical figure on a white horse will swoop in and make it better so we can keep not caring?

We really gotta get over it.